Christian Faith, Motivation, Personal Goals

Intentionally Giving Back This Holiday Season

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Today was not a normal day for me. It was unique, but in a good way.

I spent a few hours impacting nearly 10,000 lives by making sure 2,500 local families will have a warm meal on Thanksgiving Day.

Eleven of my co-workers and I volunteered at the Midwest Food Bank, partnering with Home Sweet Home Ministries and many local food pantries, to pack boxes full of the traditional Thanksgiving Day fixings: corn, green beans, cranberries, potatoes, gravy mix, stuffing, and cookies.

This coming Volunteering at the Midwest Food BankSaturday, the Midwest Food Bank will have families literally drive through (without leaving their cars) to receive a packed box, along with a fresh turkey, for them to take home.

It’s heartbreaking and very humbling to hear of such need — 2,500 families; nearly 10,000 individuals?! Yet, I left with a heart full of gratitude, a sense of “good” in the world, and a powerful reminder that we are supposed to be the hands and feet of Jesus on this earth.

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Christian Faith, Counseling, Marriage and Relationships

Crying Out to God

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Everyone Who Asks Receives

Have you ever had one of those moments when you didn’t know which way was up, or where to turn, and out of desperation for help you literally cried out to God?

I’ve had two of those in my life. The first one, I’ll tell you about now. It was a turning point for me.

I was 23 years old and in a relationship with a great guy. Only three months into dating, I was in love. I remember telling my sister and a close friend that he was “the one.” I loved him, and I could see myself spending the rest of my life with him.

By five months, he told me he loved me, and I said it back to him for the first time. This was the real deal and was becoming serious.

Then, at the eight-month mark, after spending the day together shopping and running errands, we got back to my apartment, parked the car, and he turned to me and said, “I don’t think we should see each other anymore.”

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Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals, Work Life and Career

Ask for What You Want

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Take the Risk and Make it Yours

I had a basketball coach in grade school who frequently said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” There are similar sayings, such as “You can’t score if you don’t shoot,” and “You can’t hit the ball if you don’t swing.” What all three of these sayings mean is: You can’t succeed unless you try. And trying starts with action.

That mentality stuck with me, and as a result, I now wholeheartedly believe in the philosophy that says: “Ask for what you want; the worst they can say is ‘No.’” If success starts with action, then you can act by intentionally asking for what you want.

This philosophy has proven true over and over again in my life. Let me give you two examples.

Example #1: Asking to change to part-time status at work

When I became pregnant with our first child in 2009, my husband and I talked a lot about our options for childcare — carefully considering our finances and professional goals — and asked ourselves (as most soon-to-be parents do) should we both remain full time? Should one of us quit our jobs to stay home? Is there a possibility of working part time?
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Motivation, Personal Goals

Intentional Savings

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Making sure Christmas is paid for

Admittedly, I am not a financial expert, and I won’t typically be giving financial advice within this blog. However, now that Halloween has passed, we can officially say the holidays are upon us. In fact, I know many in my inner circles who have already begun their Christmas shopping. As such, it’s timely for me to share some intentional savings guidance I received from my parents several years ago.

When Tom and I were first married, I noticed us charging a ton of expenses and gifts to our credit cards in Nov. and Dec. and then struggling after Christmas to pay off those huge expenses. In talking to my parents about this, they suggested a simple solution that had worked well for them. And not only does it work well with Christmas savings, it can really be used for all kinds of savings purposes.

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Christian Faith, Counseling, Marriage and Relationships

Intentionally Study Your Spouse

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It Could Save Your Marriage

If you’ve seen the movie Fireproof, starring Kirk Cameron as Caleb Holt, you know it’s about a firefighter whose marriage is rocky and headed towards divorce. Just when all hope seems lost, Caleb’s dad gives him a book called The Love Dare to work through for 40 days in an attempt to save the marriage. The Love Dare provides Bible verses, opportunities for prayer and intentional actions to do each day to show love to a spouse. Caleb takes the challenge on, though begrudgingly, and finds his love for his wife, Katherine, returning as his heart becomes less hardened.

I like the movie for several reasons, including how it promotes faith in Jesus Christ and suggests that everyone can benefit from counseling. But also, as you’d expect, I love the intentional actions that The Love Dare asks Caleb to complete. As he proceeds through the 40 days, the actions grow increasingly more difficult – from avoiding saying negative words to his wife, showing her a nice gesture, such as making her coffee, and buying something that shows he was thinking of her, all the way to praying for her, listening to her, and studying her.

It’s the studying her that caught my attention.

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Marriage and Relationships

Date Nights

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Making Time for Your Spouse

Those who know us, know that Tom and I are very intentional about date nights. We shoot for one, kid-free night out per month – sometimes more. We cherish our date nights for carved-out couple time, time to focus on one another, and reconnect.

When taking pre-marital classes, and in visiting with my parents who were married for 43 years before my Dad passed, we heard over and over: “You are a couple first – before having children, before taking on the roles of Mom and Dad – so it’s critical to treasure and uphold that relationship above all others” (with the exception of our relationship with God, of course).

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Christian Faith, Parenting and Motherhood

Intentionally Changing Lives

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All Fired Up To Do Something              

Late one night (because I’m a night owl and not a morning person) I was up watching an online video after the kids and Tom had gone to bed. It was former Pastor Bill Hybels of Willow Creek Community Church in South Barrington, IL, giving one of his phenomenal weekly sermons.

I remember he referenced a cartoon I never watched, but that many of you may be familiar with: Popeye the Sailor Man. Bill said Popeye had a habit of getting angry and keeping that anger bottled up inside until finally he couldn’t take it any longer. He’d be so upset, red in the face, and at his boiling point, he would shout out: “That’s all I can stands, I can’t stands no more!”

Bill used that illustration to ask the congregation what they got fired up about. What was the one thing, the one injustice, the one cruelty or evil action that stirred their insides, made them red in the face, made their blood boil, or made them cry because their hearts just absolutely broke each time they thought about it? What was the one thing that made them want to shout: “That’s all I can stands, I can’t stands no more!”?

He was encouraging the congregation to put their fingers on that one thing, and then go and do something about it. He was encouraging intentional action on the part of the church to impact and change lives. He was asking the church members to be the hands and feet of Christ in this world.

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Mindfulness, Motivation

Feeling Lighter

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The rewards of practicing “less is more.” 

We recently had several days of heavy rainfall, so my girls and I took the opportunity to clean out closets. We sorted through clothes we’d outgrown, clothes we’d worn out, and clothes we were ready to donate.

I absolutely hate this chore and dread doing it each year for the kids. But it’s an absolute must through these years when they are growing like weeds. It was also an absolute must for me who was quickly running out of closet space and fearing one day my wire racks would come tumbling down on top of me due to the sheer weight of all I was cramming in there. Thankfully, I tackled this chore before that happened. 

After working for several hours — one closet and dresser at a time — we ended the day feeling pretty darn good, in several ways: 

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Farm Life, Life Events

An Inheritance, Of Sorts

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You may have noticed all the farm-themed pictures on my blog. There’s a reason for that.

My husband, Tom, and his twin brother, Jim, recently inherited a farm on approximately 175 acres in southeast Michigan that’s been in their family since 1836 – before Michigan was a state! It’s been passed down father to son (or sons) for the past six generations! 

Before Tom’s dad passed away in 2017, we knew the farm was destined to be passed on in this same way and left jointly to Tom and Jim, but we feared what that would mean for us.

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Christian Faith, Counseling

My Journey of Intentional Self-Reflection

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…and My Book Cover

That picture there is of the cover of my book. It’s not published (yet) — it’s a work in progress — but it’s a definite goal of mine. More on that in a second.

Book cover

Most of us are familiar with the song Michael Jackson made famous titled: Man in the Mirror. But have you ever truly paid attention to the words? They struck a chord with me when my journey of self-discovery started rather unexpectedly, and out of necessity, in late 2016. First, read the lyrics. Then, let me explain…

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Creating the Life You Want – On Purpose