Category Archives: Personal Goals

Christian Faith, Motivation, Personal Goals, Work Life and Career

Do What Scares You – Here’s How

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Scrolling through my Facebook feed, I saw this quote: “Do what scares you.” I stopped to reflect on the advice. It resonated with me because I’m on the verge of doing something new, something exciting, yet something a little scary for me.

Let’s face it, any unknowns in our lives can be scary. Fear of the unknown is a very real thing. I’m sure you experience it from time to time, too. Yet, to live an intentional life in which we make things happen for ourselves, and we create opportunities, we mustn’t let fear hold us back.

To be clear, I’m not talking about skydiving, mountain climbing, or hang gliding — unless you feel passionately you need to do those things. I’m talking more about applying for that new job, starting your own business, calling that specific someone for a date, taking on a stretch assignment at work, or having difficult conversations with your children, spouse, or coworkers. Basically, those things of everyday life that have the power to paralyze us.

So what are we to do? How do we overcome our fear?

3 Steps to Overcoming Fear:

I think there are 3 things we can do; and believe me, I’m taking my own advice here.

Continue reading Do What Scares You – Here’s How →

Motivation, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals

To wait or to seize — that is the question

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I recently found myself in a conundrum. As you know, I have a strong desire to live intentionally, to chase my dreams, and be in control of my own fate (to the extent possible). However, I find this desire in contrast with giving up control, surrendering, and allowing life to unfold.

On one hand, I’m 100% bought into the idea that by living intentionally, we can make things happen for ourselves. Positive things, that otherwise wouldn’t happen. And, since I’m a planner at heart, it’s easy for me.

On the other hand, I recognize that I’m not in control of all things. In fact, trying to control everything can damage relationships, and turn one into an authoritative dictator no one wants to be around. 

So, what are we to do? Is the answer to just watch and see? Should we sit on our hands and just hope for good things? I don’t think so.

The trick is to know when to make things happen and when to allow life to unfold. 

From Stafford’s book Only Love Today

Wait or Seize?

I recently read Rachel Macy Stafford’s book Only Love Today, and it was there that I found the answer. She said it perfectly with these words: “Learn when to wait a moment and when to seize a moment.” I love that! 

It reminds me of the Bible verses found in Ecclesiastes 3: “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity…” We have to determine what the situation calls for and discern if we should wait or seize.

Continue reading To wait or to seize — that is the question →

Personal Goals, Work Life and Career

3 Ways to Positively Contribute at Work

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Intentionally Giving Back to Others

Many of you know I work for a Fortune 50 company at its Corporate Headquarters. This week, my manager and I sat down for my performance review. During the meeting, he gave me a really nice compliment. He said:

“Some people are energy neutral. 

Some take more than they give. 

Some give more than they take. 

I’d put you in this last category.” 

Nice, right?! This got me thinking about how I try to give back at work and how I positively contribute to others.

Three categories came to mind of how I do this and how I’ve seen others do it as well. What’s more, they’re easy so you can do them, too!

1)    If a problem, bring a solution

Early in my career, I had a superior tell me he appreciated the fact that when I identified a problem and wasn’t able to work through it on my own, that I would always come to him with a few potential solutions — rather than just the problem. This stuck with me as a valued practice I’ve continued to do.

So my mantra and advice is: When needing to take a problem to a superior, be ready to offer one or more possible solutions.

Continue reading 3 Ways to Positively Contribute at Work →

Counseling, Marriage and Relationships, Personal Goals

4 Tips to Excellent Communication in Marriage

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Though I’m not a marriage expert, I’m in a great marriage and learning along the way. (This month, Tom and I will celebrate our 12th wedding anniversary!) One might consider me an expert in communications since I do have a degree in it and have spent the

Picture of our hands over our bouquet of flowers on our wedding day.
Our hands and rings over our bouquet of flowers on our wedding day. Photo Credit: Holly Frey Photography

majority of my professional career working in that particular field; however, I admit to still having much to learn. Putting these 2 things together – marriage and communication – I want to offer you 4 tips to excellent communication in marriage (or other relationships).

But first, a quick story

The other day, Tom received some disheartening news. He shared it with me when I got home from work. It was disheartening for me to hear as well.  We both experienced a myriad of emotions upon learning the news and both needed to process it and work through it.

The ‘what’ doesn’t matter here, but it’s important to note that the news wasn’t the kind that would cause a fight or argument; it was simply the kind that required common understanding and decisions about next steps.

We sat through a quiet dinner in which our daughters carried the conversation between themselves while we continued our own internal processing.

After dinner, we were ready to talk. We sat down and began working through what we were thinking and feeling. That lasted 2 full hours. Through it, we came to a place of contentment and peace, and in the end, we both felt better.

Upon reflection, I was able to see what we did well in those 2 hours that led to a positive resolution of our feelings, though the news hadn’t changed.

Here’s what we did and what you can do, too, in your own relationships: Continue reading 4 Tips to Excellent Communication in Marriage →

Mindfulness, Motivation, Personal Goals

3 Reasons a Vision Board is Better Than a Resolution

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Forget Resolutions – Try a Vision Board

I’m not against New Year’s Resolutions; I like the idea of them. They’re about reflecting on your life and intentionally thinking of areas where you can improve, do better, or be better. I love that! But, if you’ve never made a vision board, you may want to try it.

Why is a vision board better? I’ll give you three reasons, (and tell you what happened when I created one in preparation for 2018).

1)    Resolutions don’t always stick

We’ve all been there: resolving with grand plans to live differently, but as soon as we’ve “fallen off the wagon” or “blown it,” the resolution goes by the wayside. If it wasn’t sustainable, or it only lasted a few weeks – or even just a few days – into January, it wasn’t very helpful.

Before December, 2017, I had only created a vision board once. It was at a financial seminar about retirement planning. During the seminar, all the attendees, me included, created our own vision boards illustrating our ideal retirement. We were asked to think about how we’d spend our time, where we’d be, who would be with us, and how much money we’d need to achieve those goals or live that way.

I enjoyed the exercise. It forced all of us to think about what we really wanted, digging deep into our personal desires and dreams. It also forced us to articulate in words or pictures what those dreams looked like, which was helpful. We could then begin working towards them – through additional savings and investments, by making more money, or spending less. Further, we could discuss the articulated goals with our significant others or spouses. This helped to ensure we were on the same page and working towards the same vision for our future.

After doing it once and seeing the value in it, I decided to give it another try to articulate my goals as the new year (2018) approached. 

Continue reading 3 Reasons a Vision Board is Better Than a Resolution →

Marriage and Relationships, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals

3 Reasons I Intentionally Send Christmas Cards

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Besides It Being a Joy for Me

Some might view sending Christmas cards as a chore or a dreaded task, but not me. It’s one of the things I most look forward to each year at Christmas time.

In fact, (none of my friends will be surprised by this) but I usually have them done before Thanksgiving. I have to restrain myself from sending them out until afterwards.

Creating and sending Christmas cards – photo cards, to be more specific – is an absolute joy for me. Here’s how it typically goes for our family.

Each Fall, we have professional family photos taken. Once they are complete, we pick our favorites and decide which are Christmas-card worthy. (I try not to let my husband share those on Facebook ahead of the Christmas cards being sent, but sometimes he forgets – like he did this year!)

By early November, I go online and view tons of holiday, photo-card templates with different colors, layouts and phrases. I then populate a few with our pictures to see which one looks the best, and we place our order based on what the majority of us like.

Then — this is my favorite part — once we have the printed photo cards, envelopes and stamps, and our list of family and friends’ addresses from our computer, my two daughters and I sit down at the kitchen table together. We turn on Christmas music in the background, and we work as a team to stuff, address, stamp and seal the envelopes.

Admittedly, this hasn’t always been as picture perfect as it sounds.

Continue reading 3 Reasons I Intentionally Send Christmas Cards →

Christian Faith, Motivation, Personal Goals

Intentionally Giving Back This Holiday Season

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Today was not a normal day for me. It was unique, but in a good way.

I spent a few hours impacting nearly 10,000 lives by making sure 2,500 local families will have a warm meal on Thanksgiving Day.

Eleven of my co-workers and I volunteered at the Midwest Food Bank, partnering with Home Sweet Home Ministries and many local food pantries, to pack boxes full of the traditional Thanksgiving Day fixings: corn, green beans, cranberries, potatoes, gravy mix, stuffing, and cookies.

This coming Volunteering at the Midwest Food BankSaturday, the Midwest Food Bank will have families literally drive through (without leaving their cars) to receive a packed box, along with a fresh turkey, for them to take home.

It’s heartbreaking and very humbling to hear of such need — 2,500 families; nearly 10,000 individuals?! Yet, I left with a heart full of gratitude, a sense of “good” in the world, and a powerful reminder that we are supposed to be the hands and feet of Jesus on this earth.

Continue reading Intentionally Giving Back This Holiday Season →

Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals, Work Life and Career

Ask for What You Want

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Take the Risk and Make it Yours

I had a basketball coach in grade school who frequently said, “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” There are similar sayings, such as “You can’t score if you don’t shoot,” and “You can’t hit the ball if you don’t swing.” What all three of these sayings mean is: You can’t succeed unless you try. And trying starts with action.

That mentality stuck with me, and as a result, I now wholeheartedly believe in the philosophy that says: “Ask for what you want; the worst they can say is ‘No.’” If success starts with action, then you can act by intentionally asking for what you want.

This philosophy has proven true over and over again in my life. Let me give you two examples.

Example #1: Asking to change to part-time status at work

When I became pregnant with our first child in 2009, my husband and I talked a lot about our options for childcare — carefully considering our finances and professional goals — and asked ourselves (as most soon-to-be parents do) should we both remain full time? Should one of us quit our jobs to stay home? Is there a possibility of working part time?
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Motivation, Personal Goals

Intentional Savings

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Making sure Christmas is paid for

Admittedly, I am not a financial expert, and I won’t typically be giving financial advice within this blog. However, now that Halloween has passed, we can officially say the holidays are upon us. In fact, I know many in my inner circles who have already begun their Christmas shopping. As such, it’s timely for me to share some intentional savings guidance I received from my parents several years ago.

When Tom and I were first married, I noticed us charging a ton of expenses and gifts to our credit cards in Nov. and Dec. and then struggling after Christmas to pay off those huge expenses. In talking to my parents about this, they suggested a simple solution that had worked well for them. And not only does it work well with Christmas savings, it can really be used for all kinds of savings purposes.

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Personal Goals, Work Life and Career

Intentional Thank You’s at Work

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When we were little, we were taught to say “please” and “thank you.” It’s common courtesy. As adults, it’s easy to say those words a hundred times throughout our day with little to no thought behind them. But, when someone takes the time to sit down and write out a sincere thank you, that really means something.

Throughout my career, I’ve been blessed with wonderful managers and mentors who truly left their mark on me. They were caring, had my best interests at heart, and were excellent role models. I learned more by watching and observing their leadership styles than I could have learned in any classroom setting or by completing online training courses.

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