Farm Life, Personal Goals

2023 On the Farm – Reflecting on Progress

Leave a comment

My husband, brother-in-law, and I frequently get asked about the latest projects we’re doing on our farm. We love that question. It’s indicative of the work we’ve done over the past three years (from Dec. 2020 to Dec. 2023).

We’re busy remodeling, restoring and refreshing my husband’s family’s (nearly) bi-centennial farm in Michigan.

Photo Credit Michigan Photography and Austin Thomason

As I look back at what we’ve accomplished to date, it’s amazing. And that’s not bragging because it’s not what we’ve done in our strength, but what has been accomplished as we sought the help of countless others.

Farmers, firefighters, conservationists, demolition and excavating companies, and more, are part of our 2023 story.

If you look back to 2020 and even before, so many others contributed to our progress. But for now, I’d like to focus on 2023 as the end of the year allows for reflection. I always enjoy reflecting before intentionally planning and strategizing the year ahead. 

Looking back

House demolition

In March, after several years of careful planning and prep work, several local fire departments helped to burn down the 1854 farmhouse on our property.

We donated the home, which was beyond repair, to  the firefighters for several training exercises. It was the home where Tom’s and Jim’s great-grandfather and family lived, and then where Tom, Jim and their family lived. Read the full story here.

What an incredible experience to be part of! And we are forever grateful for the partnership with the fire departments to complete that daunting task. 

After the fire, two chimneys remained that needed to be pushed into the old basement. Excavators came to complete that job and to grade smooth the previous site of the house.

What you don’t see here, is the work our family did to pick up rocks and tree limbs and put down grass seed. Hours of work, but we didn’t mind it one bit. And now, we have a beautiful side yard. 

Continue reading 2023 On the Farm – Reflecting on Progress →

Christian Faith, Farm Life, Personal Goals

A Day to Remember on the Farm

10 Comments

It’s amazing when a plan comes together and goes better than you imagined. That’s what happened this past Sunday, March 19, 2023, when firefighters from three nearby areas came to our farm and executed a controlled burn on one of the two houses. In less than two hours, it completely burned to the ground, yet the planning and preparation had been in the works for 4 ½ years, since the Fall of 2017.

You may wonder why we would demolish a home, especially one that:

  • Was a landmark on our historic farm and rich in history 
  • Was my husband’s childhood home 
  • Served as a temporary home to our family from June – October 2021, while we waited for the remodel next door to be complete 

Let me explain

My husband’s family farm is nearly 200 years old. It has been passed down from father to son for six generations. During those generations, several homes were constructed on the property.

The original home was a log cabin. Then in 1854, the home we’re talking about was built (pictured below in 1910). It was the home of my husband Tom’s great-great-great-grandfather.

Later, in 1911, Tom’s great-grandfather built another house on the property right next door — the home we remodeled and restored in 2021 and live in now. 

Continue reading A Day to Remember on the Farm →

Health and Fitness, Mindfulness, Motivation

Begin to Savor

Leave a comment

This post contains an affiliate link. For details, see my full disclosure policy.

When you hear something new, you may think: “That’s interesting.” But when you hear the same thing multiple times from different sources, you might think: “I need to take note of this.” That’s what happened to me with the idea of savoring. 

I heard it first from author and speaker, Mel Robbins, while watching several of her short YouTube segments. I also heard about it from the healthy habits program that’s helping me lose weight and maintain a healthy mindset. And then I heard about it again during a webinar I attended at work. My conclusion: “There must be something to this, and I ought to try it.” 

What is savoring?

Savoring is a type of mindfulness that allows you to use all your senses – taste, smell, touch, sight, and sound. It’s about slowing down and noticing – becoming aware of what’s happening around you and appreciating the goodness. The appreciation is what counts.  Savoring allows us to fully enjoy our experiences and prevents us from letting them pass by unappreciated.

According to positivepsycholpedia.com, it’s defined as “the capacity to attend to, appreciate, and enhance the positive experiences in your life.” When we savor, we’re having positive feelings and we’re aware of them.

Examples

Mel Robbins described many items she has in her dining room that bring her joy and that she appreciates. For example, she mentioned her crystal chandelier over the table that, for a brief time every afternoon when the sun shines through the crystals, sprays rainbow prisms all over the walls. To her, it’s a beautiful sight. 

Continue reading Begin to Savor →

Motivation, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals

3 Things I Learned from My Failed Blog

Quote Leave a comment

3 Things I Learned from My Failed Blog

This post contains an affiliate link. Please see my full disclosure policy.

Just because you can’t right now, doesn’t mean you can’t ever! What are you wanting to achieve in 2022 that you aren’t quite sure you’ll be able to do? Do you have big dreams and goals that feel a bit out of reach? I do, too. But let me encourage you with a quick story about a failed blog of mine.

My Story

When I became a mom in 2010, I realized just how much I had to learn. Babies don’t come with instruction manuals or directions, and I was clueless about so many things!

Working only part-time and with a love of writing, I wondered if I could start a blog and chronicle all that I was having to figure out and learn. I thought it might help other young moms and give me something else to do when the days grew long with just me and my baby at home.

I went online and bought a domain name and website. I called it, “A Learning Mom”. That was fitting, and I liked the sound of “alearningmom.com”. Nice ring to it, don’t you think?

The problem was, I had no idea how to start a blog, format it, add new posts, new pages, pictures — no clue! I had a website with a fancy colorful title, but nothing else.

The idea quickly died…a total failed attempt.

Mind you, this was back in the day when Artificial Intelligence (AI) and machine learning wasn’t a thing — or if it was, it wasn’t sophisticated or well known. Though I had an interest in blogging, my phone and computer were unaware and unable to push helpful content to me. As a result, the idea quickly died, and I let the domain name and website go. A total failed attempt at blogging.

Fast forward to 2017 and 2018. I signed up for a course about blogging, and then — thanks to AI and machine learning — was inundated with information and training on starting a blog. New content and tempting courses filled my social media newsfeeds daily.

This time, there was no stopping me. Originally, I had only the desire. But now I had the desire plus the knowledge and ability!

With this new blog, I broadened the title and subject matter, and thus Yours Intentionally was born!

Here’s the lesson from this tale.

Continue reading 3 Things I Learned from My Failed Blog →

Farm Life, Life Events, Parenting and Motherhood

Priority #1: Making Friends

2 Comments

With any household move or relocation, there’s an element of ‘scary’. It’s so much change all at once and oftentimes involves finding and forming brand new relationships. In our family’s case — moving several states away to live on a rural farm — we definitely have to be intentional about making friends. 

Before we moved, the girls and I prayed many nights that God would bring good people into our lives. We prayed He would handpick really special individuals for us. 

But we knew making friends would require effort on our part also. We need to be a friend to have a friend. We need to display courage and vulnerability in order to show others who we are. In addition, we need to put ourselves in places, or create opportunities, to find the people God wants us to meet. 

 

Our approach to finding and making friends has been multi-pronged, including joining activities, tapping into already-formed relationships, and seeking out events where people are social.

We became joiners

Prior to moving, I researched and scoped out activities my girls could participate in. Does the area have a local dance studio or gymnastics place? Is there a volleyball team for my girls’ ages? Where can they take music lessons? What types of summer camps are available? 

I didn’t want to overload our schedules, I simply wanted to be sure my girls wouldn’t get to the farm, find no one around, and be bored out of their minds. In my mind, I envisioned the scenario going like this: “We went on several Gator rides, we explored the farm fields, now what? There’s no one to play with. I’m SO BORED!” All parents have had those conversations even if not living rurally, right?

I found a few possible options, and we talked about whether or not they wanted to pursue them. Once we moved to the farm, it was sign-up time. No more exploring or researching, it was time to commit and get involved. 

I signed our oldest up for two weeks of Volleyball camp — one in July and one in August. We joined the Summer Reading Program at the beautiful and quaint local library, which we visited often. We found a free event provided by the local YMCA every Tuesday to attend. We joined a local church and started attending the service that includes a kids’ program. I signed both girls up for Vacation Bible School. Through many of those connections, we found moms with kids my girls’ ages to have playdates with, and we have met some really wonderful families. 

Continue reading Priority #1: Making Friends →

Christian Faith, Farm Life

Living on the farm: 5 weeks in!

9 Comments

Why would we do such a thing?

Just over a month ago, my daughters and I moved out of state, out of our comfortable in-town living, and began a new life in the country on a farm. Homesteading, I think, is the official term for what we’re doing. Wow, what a change!

Thankfully, the farm wasn’t foreign to us. It’s been in my husband’s family for multiple generations, and we visited often since the girls were born to see their grandpa. Once my father-in-law passed and my husband inherited the farm, along with his identical twin brother, our visits became more frequent and longer. 

L to R: my brother-in-law, the girls and I, and my husband. Plus our Black Labs.

Still, visiting a farm and living on a farm are quite different. Especially a farm that needs a ton of work and rejuvenation.

We’re demolishing out-buildings, tearing out rotted fences, taking down dead trees, saving for and scheduling a barn-roof repair, restoring and fixing up tractors, and remodeling one of the two farmhouses. (And when I say “we,” I mostly mean: my husband, his brother, and a whole slew of people we’ve hired to do this, that, and the other thing.) The girls and I help when we can, but much of the work is either on a grand scale or requires specialized skills. 

In the meantime, we’re living in the older of the two houses, which is where my husband grew up while his grandparents lived next door. The oldest farmhouse, built in 1854 by a local builder, while neat in its own right, is a place to stay but one that offers very few amenities. We’re living without central air — in June, July & August. We’re without a dishwasher and have no oven or stove — which I can tell you makes meal planning way more difficult. We also have 5 people in the house and only 1 teeny-tiny bathroom.  Also, I’ll spare you the dramatic story,  but we had a bat flying around our living space recently at bedtime, which was a definite first for me. 

Our temporary housing
Our temporary housing

Continue reading Living on the farm: 5 weeks in! →

Parenting and Motherhood

Moms Set the Tone — It’s a Superpower

Leave a comment

You’ve heard the phrase “When mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” That’s the truth! In fact, it may be an understatement. But the opposite is true as well: When mama is happy, everybody is happy! We moms have the power to change moods, influence the room, enflame or defuse tempers, and affect the overall tone of our households. We set the tone.

This is a powerful thing. Not to misuse, but to intentionally embrace, when needed, and to be aware of so you can have a more positive influence than negative.

Disclaimer:

Before I share the three ways I think this is true, let me provide a disclaimer. My kids are elementary-school age. I can’t yet speak to how teenagers respond (though I am familiar with the eye roll). If you’re a mom of teenagers currently, or you’ve survived that stage, I’d love to hear if any of the advice below resonates, or if it’s a whole new ballgame in the teenage years.

3 ways Moms set the tone

For those of us having lived through 2020 with younger kids, there are three ways I think Moms set the tone.

1. I am President, CEO, and leader of my family and household

Continue reading Moms Set the Tone — It’s a Superpower →

Parenting and Motherhood, Uncategorized, Work Life and Career

The right mindset equals success

Leave a comment

This post contains affiliate links. See my full disclosure policy for details.

Working parents of school-aged children: this post is for you.

Stress levels elevated? Sleepless nights? Worried about how you’ll survive this pandemic with all the pressures of work, remote learning, and regular home-life responsibilities? Check, check, and check! Then you might be — like me — a working parent of school-aged children.

This pandemic has not been easy on any of us, and it’s about to grow even more complex.

In the next few weeks, children across the country will be returning to school, but not the way they’ve typically done, and for some, not physically. Many will engage in remote learning – either 100% or greater than 50% if using a blended approach of both remote and in-person learning. While not ideal, and certainly not something any of us wished for, there is something we can do as parents that will set our kids up for success. We can have the right mindset.

While everyone’s situation is unique and different, for our household, it looks like this:

  • My husband is an essential employee who works outside the home
  • I’m working from home full time, and
  • I’m faced with creating a homeschooling environment to support remote learning for my school-aged children (like many of you).

It’s daunting. I’ve spent countless hours playing out different scenarios in my mind trying to figure out how we’ll make it all work. Inevitably, my blood pressure and stress levels would rise or my sleep would suffer before I chose to think about something else.

Then I realized I wasn’t looking at this situation correctly. I needed to shift my mindset.

Continue reading The right mindset equals success →

Christian Faith, Counseling, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals

The 5 Ps of Intentional Parenting

2 Comments

We were driving through town with the windows rolled down, and the three of us belly-laughed for about the fifth time in only a few minutes. My two daughters and I were spending a sunny afternoon running errands together.

After the laughter subsided, my oldest said, “Something’s different lately. You seem happier, and you aren’t yelling at us as much. What changed?”

“Hmm. I don’t know…” I said.

But I did know, and a little grin spread across my face as a warm feeling grew inside my heart. The truth was, I’d been working to improve myself in order to improve my relationships. Apparently, it was working and being noticed, which was extremely rewarding.

I’ve been spending time focusing on what I’ll refer to here as the 5 Ps of Intentional Parenting:

  • Pray
  • Play
  • Praise
  • Protect
  • Prepare

Quick history

Before I explain, let me take you back to 2017 & 2018. I found myself extremely unhappy with several relationships in my life. I sought counseling to help me manage and cope. At the time, I learned several helpful strategies that immensely improved my relationships because of changes I made within myself – in my heart and in my head.

But lately, I had reverted back to some old habits and old ways of thinking. I had forgotten to apply the strategies, and it was beginning to show – big time.

In my parenting, I felt angry, frustrated, and disconnected from my kids more often than I liked. I knew they felt it, too. It was showing up in how often I scolded and bossed rather than instructed or asked. How I reacted rather than responded. How I was quicker to shoe them off than pull them close. This started to really bother me, and I knew it was time to work on myself – again.

In doing so, I came up with these 5 Ps of Intentional Parenting. When I reflect on what I want to be as a parent and what my kids need me to be as a mom, these 5 Ps sum it up. If you’re a parent wanting to be more intentional with your kids and wondering how, let me encourage you to start here.

Continue reading The 5 Ps of Intentional Parenting →

Christian Faith, Mindfulness, Motivation, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals

Shifting Focus

Leave a comment

Has this ever happened to you: You set out determined to do one thing and pretty soon you realize God had something else in mind for you? It recently happened to me, and it’s been an eye-opening experience.

It’s no secret that I try to live intentionally, so at the beginning of 2020, I set a one-word intention for the year. This is becoming quite a popular thing to do; many are choosing to set intentions rather than resolutions since resolutions have a bad rap for not lasting more than a few days.

What word did I choose for 2020? The word FOCUS.

Here’s why. I had set pretty big goals for myself in 2019 and worked hard to achieve them. Having made some awesome progress, I decided to buckle down and set out to achieve even more. My thought was simply that I needed additional focus. I thought if I could just zoom in and get really clear about my goals, I’d make forward progress. I would use the word FOCUS to remind myself to stay the course, avoid distraction, and not be derailed.

My one-word intention for 2020.

I also created a vision board for 2020 and have it displayed in my bathroom where I can see it every morning and night. As I’ve been focusing on its six categories and the images intended to inspire me to achieve those goals, I remind myself to work towards them and put in the effort to make them a reality.

But here’s the funny thing… it’s now mid-February, and I believe the word FOCUS is being laid on my heart in a very new and different way. It’s as if God is revealing to me what 2020 is really going to be about despite what I had in mind.

I believe God is shifting my focus.

Continue reading Shifting Focus →

Creating the Life You Want – On Purpose