Category Archives: Parenting and Motherhood

Health and Fitness, Life Events, Mindfulness, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals

Thrive in ’25

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I’ve always relished the end of the year as a time to look back and reflect. A time to consider what went well, what could have gone better, what you want to do more or less of, and what goals you look forward to achieving in the coming year. 

At the end of 2024, I invited into the conversation my two daughters who are now in 9th and 6th grades at ages 14 and 11. I asked them how they felt the year went and what they were proud of. Surprisingly, the conversation turned into us talking about the BEST year of our lives. Ironically, it wasn’t this past year or the year before. It was 2022. We all agreed that was the very best year any of us ever had. It made me wonder: What made 2022 so great for all of us? What were we doing that made it the best? And, most importantly, could we recreate that somehow? 

As we reflected and continued to talk, several things became clear. 

Recreating our best year

It was our second year living in Michigan after moving to my husband’s family farm. We were finally feeling a little more settled. Settled into our remodeled home, settled in at a new church, settled into the schools that had been brand new to them in 6th and 3rd grades, but in 7th and 4th, they had more confidence. They had found their friend group and felt a sense of belonging. It was also the first year Anna found her love of volleyball by joining the school team. Also, both loved their teachers and the kids in their classes. It was just good for them all around. 

Focused on health and feeling amazing

For me, it was a year in which I was focused on my health. I started a healthy habits program in August 2021, and with my success, I decided to become a health coach by December 2021. With that, I entered 2022, feeling focused and determined. I attended yoga regularly with friends, drank tons of water, followed my dietary program, and enjoyed cooking new, healthy recipes. I also focused on healthy motion and getting more movement into my day as I have a mostly sedentary lifestyle.

I ultimately lost 26 pounds and gained health and freedom! I began helping others drop unwanted pounds, too. It’s an incredible feeling being able to add value to others and be part of someone else’s success story. There’s nothing like it.

I felt better than ever mentally and physically. I looked amazing and felt young and strong. Truly, I felt unstoppable and limitless – as though, if I could do this, I could do anything! 

New speaking opportunities

Those feelings bred greater confidence, which allowed me to say ‘yes’ to a speaking engagement at the end of the year. My mother-in-law asked me to speak at the Advent Tea she was organizing for her church. I spoke on the topic of Joy and felt so elated afterward. I knew I needed to find more opportunities to speak publicly because it was so fulfilling for me. Honestly, it’s always been a dream I’ve secretly harbored.

Shortly thereafter, our church put out a solicitation for individuals to help with announcements, offering and prayer during the services. And there it was: an opportunity to use my God-given talents in a way that both served the church and also filled my cup personally. I’ve been serving in that capacity for nearly two years now. 

It also was the year that my company granted me a ‘full remote’ opportunity. Prior to that, I had been in limbo wondering if I’d be able to keep my job. Wondering if the company would continue to require me to travel back to IL periodically to fulfill ‘hybrid’ requirements for required time in office. Wondering if I needed to seek employment elsewhere. It had been stressful with the unknown looming. So, when the decision to allow me to be 100% remote was shared with me, it was a great relief – a decision I’m still grateful for today.

Travel and adventures

2022 was also a year of travel and adventure. I found myself on an airplane three times that year, which for me, was unheard of. I didn’t recognize myself.

The first trip was a business trip that I decided to take my mom and daughters on with me because it was to Arizona, and they love that state! While I attended meetings, they shopped or spent the heat of the day of the hotel’s rooftop swimming pool, which they had mostly to themselves! We met up for dinners and evening sightseeing.

The second trip was to California as a family that summer. My husband has relatives in the San Francisco Bay area who invited us to stay with them and who graciously showed us all the fun hotspots. It was a blast and an opportunity to get to know cousins we’d never met before.

The last trip was to my first Health Coach convention in Atlanta, GA. This time I travelled by myself, which was a huge growth moment as it required me to step way out of my comfort zone.

But I’m so glad I did it! I had a great time connecting with thousands of other likeminded people seeking to live healthy lives and help transform the lives of others for the better!

What happened?

So here we were, nearing the end of 2024, looking back and reflecting on how awesome 2022 had been. Which made me wonder, what had happened in 2023 and 2024 that made them less than our best. 

That was easy, at least for me. A life event in the summer of 2023 left me reeling mentally and hurting emotionally. If you’ve ever had your bubble burst, you can relate; but it was worse than that. This event left me questioning safety and security, which I had taken for granted. It showed me the ugliest side of human beings and scared me. The details aren’t important; the point is, that event derailed my mental health, which took my focus off my physical health. 

I stopped going to yoga, and instead of the discipline I once had following healthy habits, I returned to comfort foods to soothe negative emotions. My weight started to return. I felt like a fraud coaching healthy habits when I wasn’t practicing what I preached. I was afraid to continue to put myself out there publicly, so I silenced my voice. I stopped blogging, posted far less on social media, and stopped sharing inspiring, grateful posts because I no longer felt inspired or grateful. My spirit was crushed, and out of fear, I stopped sharing my thoughts online, which was devastating because my dreams of more public speaking, coaching, blogging, and inspiring all took a back seat. And you know what, when your dreams die, a little bit of you dies, too.

Too young to let dreams die

Upon reflection, I’ve decided I’m too young to let my dreams die. I’ve decided the world can use my voice, my talents, my light, and I’m not going to let the darkness win. Evil people and that 2023 event scared me, yes, but I’m not about to let that silence me forever and kill my dreams.

The conversation with my girls about 2022 made me realize there’s much within my control that I can do to recreate that BEST year of our lives and live that way yet again. 

I’m blogging right now. I started back at yoga. I’m focusing again on my healthy habits with water, diet, and exercise. I’m working hard on my mental state and focusing on gratitude for all that is good in my life – and there is SO much! 

I’m leaning into my faith in God, and the belief that He is always in control, and He sees all. When fear takes over, I remember this, and I trust in this.

We’re strong again and ready to take on this new year. Our new family motto is “Thrive in ’25!” And so far, so good.

Not 100% bad

It wasn’t that 2023 and 2024 were all bad. There were still many blessings and lots of growth. Growth in our faith, in our work, in our parenting, and our marriage. There were new sports and new friendships. There were new experiences, small trips throughout the state of MI, and even a family vacation to Myrtle Beach, SC, which was amazing! 2023 and 2024 just weren’t the BEST they could have been, and I want more years that are the BEST. Ones that just continue to get better and top the previous. I want to truly live and truly thrive.

Acknowledgement

At the same time, I recognize that you may not be in the same place, and that’s okay. Let’s acknowledge that many suffer in private with problems and pain we’ll never know about. They hide the hurt, put on a strong face, keep trudging through, and cry countless tears behind closed doors. I want to offer compassion if that’s you or where you find yourself right now. I can also offer encouragement that the only constant is change, and this, too, shall pass.

Your turn

Now it’s your turn…. As you reflect, what year comes to mind as your very BEST? Can you recreate some of the same habits, behaviors, or activities you were doing then?

I always love to hear from you and enjoy hearing how you’re being intentional. In 2025, my family and I will be working intentionally to thrive and say that THIS was our BEST year yet. What will you be working towards?

Yours intentionally, Amanda

Motivation, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals

3 Things I Learned from My Failed Blog

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3 Things I Learned from My Failed Blog

This post contains an affiliate link. Please see my full disclosure policy.

Just because you can’t right now, doesn’t mean you can’t ever! What are you wanting to achieve in 2022 that you aren’t quite sure you’ll be able to do? Do you have big dreams and goals that feel a bit out of reach? I do, too. But let me encourage you with a quick story about a failed blog of mine.

My Story

When I became a mom in 2010, I realized just how much I had to learn. Babies don’t come with instruction manuals or directions, and I was clueless about so many things!

Working only part-time and with a love of writing, I wondered if I could start a blog and chronicle all that I was having to figure out and learn. I thought it might help other young moms and give me something else to do when the days grew long with just me and my baby at home.

I went online and bought a domain name and website. I called it, “A Learning Mom”. That was fitting, and I liked the sound of “alearningmom.com”. Nice ring to it, don’t you think?

The problem was, I had no idea how to start a blog, format it, add new posts, new pages, pictures — no clue! I had a website with a fancy colorful title, but nothing else.

The idea quickly died…a total failed attempt.

Mind you, this was back in the day when Artificial Intelligence (AI) and machine learning wasn’t a thing — or if it was, it wasn’t sophisticated or well known. Though I had an interest in blogging, my phone and computer were unaware and unable to push helpful content to me. As a result, the idea quickly died, and I let the domain name and website go. A total failed attempt at blogging.

Fast forward to 2017 and 2018. I signed up for a course about blogging, and then — thanks to AI and machine learning — was inundated with information and training on starting a blog. New content and tempting courses filled my social media newsfeeds daily.

This time, there was no stopping me. Originally, I had only the desire. But now I had the desire plus the knowledge and ability!

With this new blog, I broadened the title and subject matter, and thus Yours Intentionally was born!

Here’s the lesson from this tale.

Continue reading 3 Things I Learned from My Failed Blog →

Farm Life, Life Events, Parenting and Motherhood

Priority #1: Making Friends

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With any household move or relocation, there’s an element of ‘scary’. It’s so much change all at once and oftentimes involves finding and forming brand new relationships. In our family’s case — moving several states away to live on a rural farm — we definitely have to be intentional about making friends. 

Before we moved, the girls and I prayed many nights that God would bring good people into our lives. We prayed He would handpick really special individuals for us. 

But we knew making friends would require effort on our part also. We need to be a friend to have a friend. We need to display courage and vulnerability in order to show others who we are. In addition, we need to put ourselves in places, or create opportunities, to find the people God wants us to meet. 

 

Our approach to finding and making friends has been multi-pronged, including joining activities, tapping into already-formed relationships, and seeking out events where people are social.

We became joiners

Prior to moving, I researched and scoped out activities my girls could participate in. Does the area have a local dance studio or gymnastics place? Is there a volleyball team for my girls’ ages? Where can they take music lessons? What types of summer camps are available? 

I didn’t want to overload our schedules, I simply wanted to be sure my girls wouldn’t get to the farm, find no one around, and be bored out of their minds. In my mind, I envisioned the scenario going like this: “We went on several Gator rides, we explored the farm fields, now what? There’s no one to play with. I’m SO BORED!” All parents have had those conversations even if not living rurally, right?

I found a few possible options, and we talked about whether or not they wanted to pursue them. Once we moved to the farm, it was sign-up time. No more exploring or researching, it was time to commit and get involved. 

I signed our oldest up for two weeks of Volleyball camp — one in July and one in August. We joined the Summer Reading Program at the beautiful and quaint local library, which we visited often. We found a free event provided by the local YMCA every Tuesday to attend. We joined a local church and started attending the service that includes a kids’ program. I signed both girls up for Vacation Bible School. Through many of those connections, we found moms with kids my girls’ ages to have playdates with, and we have met some really wonderful families. 

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Parenting and Motherhood

Moms Set the Tone — It’s a Superpower

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You’ve heard the phrase “When mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” That’s the truth! In fact, it may be an understatement. But the opposite is true as well: When mama is happy, everybody is happy! We moms have the power to change moods, influence the room, enflame or defuse tempers, and affect the overall tone of our households. We set the tone.

This is a powerful thing. Not to misuse, but to intentionally embrace, when needed, and to be aware of so you can have a more positive influence than negative.

Disclaimer:

Before I share the three ways I think this is true, let me provide a disclaimer. My kids are elementary-school age. I can’t yet speak to how teenagers respond (though I am familiar with the eye roll). If you’re a mom of teenagers currently, or you’ve survived that stage, I’d love to hear if any of the advice below resonates, or if it’s a whole new ballgame in the teenage years.

3 ways Moms set the tone

For those of us having lived through 2020 with younger kids, there are three ways I think Moms set the tone.

1. I am President, CEO, and leader of my family and household

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Parenting and Motherhood, Uncategorized, Work Life and Career

The right mindset equals success

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This post contains affiliate links. See my full disclosure policy for details.

Working parents of school-aged children: this post is for you.

Stress levels elevated? Sleepless nights? Worried about how you’ll survive this pandemic with all the pressures of work, remote learning, and regular home-life responsibilities? Check, check, and check! Then you might be — like me — a working parent of school-aged children.

This pandemic has not been easy on any of us, and it’s about to grow even more complex.

In the next few weeks, children across the country will be returning to school, but not the way they’ve typically done, and for some, not physically. Many will engage in remote learning – either 100% or greater than 50% if using a blended approach of both remote and in-person learning. While not ideal, and certainly not something any of us wished for, there is something we can do as parents that will set our kids up for success. We can have the right mindset.

While everyone’s situation is unique and different, for our household, it looks like this:

  • My husband is an essential employee who works outside the home
  • I’m working from home full time, and
  • I’m faced with creating a homeschooling environment to support remote learning for my school-aged children (like many of you).

It’s daunting. I’ve spent countless hours playing out different scenarios in my mind trying to figure out how we’ll make it all work. Inevitably, my blood pressure and stress levels would rise or my sleep would suffer before I chose to think about something else.

Then I realized I wasn’t looking at this situation correctly. I needed to shift my mindset.

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Christian Faith, Counseling, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals

The 5 Ps of Intentional Parenting

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We were driving through town with the windows rolled down, and the three of us belly-laughed for about the fifth time in only a few minutes. My two daughters and I were spending a sunny afternoon running errands together.

After the laughter subsided, my oldest said, “Something’s different lately. You seem happier, and you aren’t yelling at us as much. What changed?”

“Hmm. I don’t know…” I said.

But I did know, and a little grin spread across my face as a warm feeling grew inside my heart. The truth was, I’d been working to improve myself in order to improve my relationships. Apparently, it was working and being noticed, which was extremely rewarding.

I’ve been spending time focusing on what I’ll refer to here as the 5 Ps of Intentional Parenting:

  • Pray
  • Play
  • Praise
  • Protect
  • Prepare

Quick history

Before I explain, let me take you back to 2017 & 2018. I found myself extremely unhappy with several relationships in my life. I sought counseling to help me manage and cope. At the time, I learned several helpful strategies that immensely improved my relationships because of changes I made within myself – in my heart and in my head.

But lately, I had reverted back to some old habits and old ways of thinking. I had forgotten to apply the strategies, and it was beginning to show – big time.

In my parenting, I felt angry, frustrated, and disconnected from my kids more often than I liked. I knew they felt it, too. It was showing up in how often I scolded and bossed rather than instructed or asked. How I reacted rather than responded. How I was quicker to shoe them off than pull them close. This started to really bother me, and I knew it was time to work on myself – again.

In doing so, I came up with these 5 Ps of Intentional Parenting. When I reflect on what I want to be as a parent and what my kids need me to be as a mom, these 5 Ps sum it up. If you’re a parent wanting to be more intentional with your kids and wondering how, let me encourage you to start here.

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Christian Faith, Mindfulness, Motivation, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals

Shifting Focus

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Has this ever happened to you: You set out determined to do one thing and pretty soon you realize God had something else in mind for you? It recently happened to me, and it’s been an eye-opening experience.

It’s no secret that I try to live intentionally, so at the beginning of 2020, I set a one-word intention for the year. This is becoming quite a popular thing to do; many are choosing to set intentions rather than resolutions since resolutions have a bad rap for not lasting more than a few days.

What word did I choose for 2020? The word FOCUS.

Here’s why. I had set pretty big goals for myself in 2019 and worked hard to achieve them. Having made some awesome progress, I decided to buckle down and set out to achieve even more. My thought was simply that I needed additional focus. I thought if I could just zoom in and get really clear about my goals, I’d make forward progress. I would use the word FOCUS to remind myself to stay the course, avoid distraction, and not be derailed.

My one-word intention for 2020.

I also created a vision board for 2020 and have it displayed in my bathroom where I can see it every morning and night. As I’ve been focusing on its six categories and the images intended to inspire me to achieve those goals, I remind myself to work towards them and put in the effort to make them a reality.

But here’s the funny thing… it’s now mid-February, and I believe the word FOCUS is being laid on my heart in a very new and different way. It’s as if God is revealing to me what 2020 is really going to be about despite what I had in mind.

I believe God is shifting my focus.

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Christian Faith, Counseling, Marriage and Relationships, Mindfulness, Motivation, Parenting and Motherhood

Asking for Help Can Be Life Changing

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In today’s society, we like to pretend we’ve got life all figured out. We put on a happy face to mask our problems. We appear on the outside as being “put together” though inside we have our struggles. We post images of ourselves and our families on social media that show us at our very best, presenting our good sides and leaving the bad and the ugly hidden from the world.

But the truth is, nobody has it all figured out. We’re all just doing the best we can with the same limited resources – time, money and energy. So what’s the answer? I think we all need to get better at simply asking for help.

Asking for help from others

This is not easy – especially for those who don’t want to appear needy or be seen as dependent on others. However, I’ve come to realize we’ve just got to get over that. A little help from a friend can make a tremendous difference. Let me give you an example from my own life.

My husband works 7am-3pm and leaves the house by 6:30 each morning. He’s worked this shift since before our two kids were born. I start work after 8am, so it’s been my responsibility to get the kids ready for school and drive them across town before I head to the office. The mornings have always been hectic and one of my least favorite parts of the day.

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Health and Fitness, Marriage and Relationships, Mindfulness, Motivation, Parenting and Motherhood, Personal Goals, Work Life and Career

Our Beliefs Influence Our Actions

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We’ve all seen the board sign that says, “She believed she could, so she did,” right?  It makes a nice wall hanging and adds to our décor, but have you ever really thought about that phrase? It’s both accurate and motivating.

Believed she could Board Sign
‘Believed She Could’ Board Sign

I’m learning, through multiple sources, that our beliefs shape our thoughts and emotions, which ultimately determine our actions and behaviors. This makes what we tell ourselves and what we believe extremely important.

My conclusion, of course, is that we need to be intentional about telling ourselves we’ll be successful and believing that we will be. Or telling ourselves that we’re capable and truly believing that we are.

Our beliefs influence our actions

Belief alone is not enough; the other half of the equation is following through and taking necessary actions. However, since beliefs influence our actions, we must first get our thoughts and beliefs solidified.

Our beliefs shape our thoughts and emotions, which ultimately determine our actions and behaviors. This makes what we tell ourselves and what we believe extremely important.

Far too often, we let limiting beliefs about ourselves hold us back from actually achieving what we want in life. We might believe we aren’t good enough or not worthy. Or perhaps we think it’s going to be too hard or that we’ll never be able to change ourselves or our situations.

It’s the difference between having a Growth Mindset and a Fixed Mindset. Believing you are stuck or that your efforts can’t change your life or your current situation, equates to having a Fixed Mindset. But when we believe that our own efforts can make a difference, and that we can change/improve/grow, we have a Growth Mindset. It comes down to what we believe.

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Christian Faith, Mindfulness, Parenting and Motherhood

The 3 Best Times for Connection with Kids

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I grew up in a household where open conversation and dialogue was welcomed. It was how we established trust and a deep sense of unconditional love, acceptance and belonging. My parents welcomed questions and conversations about the hard stuff and the big stuff, but they showed a genuine interest in the little stuff of everyday life, too – and that’s where true connection happens with kids.

Times have changed, and we now live in a digital world in which it often feels like everyone in the household (no matter the age) is behind a screen and uninterested in engaging in conversation. Though it seems that way, that couldn’t be further from the truth. People are still interested in connecting; we just have to be more intentional about making it happen.

From my experience

I’ve found 3 times that are best for true connection with my kids. Times when no screens are present and open conversation and dialogue occur freely and naturally. I welcome these times because I, like my parents, want to let my kids know we have a relationship of trust, they are loved unconditionally, they are accepted, and they belong.

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